Jiwang bcoz of The Reason....

"One could fall in love many times during the course of a lifetime, but the first rush of love always holds a special place in our hearts"..

I am 100% agree with the statement.. 

I believe that evryone have their own first love story..and so do i...

I experience my first love in life when i was in form 5..

He is my age ... born in year 1987... 

At first i dont even bother him bcoz i know that boys are 'nakal' and it is their tradition to flirt over girls..

but..

i dont know why, i fell in love with this guy.. he isnt handsome, he isnt clever, he isnt a good student and all in all , he isnt perfect!!~~

But i really into him at that moment... hell!!!!!!!! maybe, the imperfectness in him makes me really into him at that time... 

We sms each other evryday...day and night...

i dont care if i spend my money only for the topup rather than shopping... 

but...we are NOT DATING...and we are NOT COUPLE... 

no relationship btw us.. 

He calls me but i never answer his calls...

i dont knw why..

everytime he calls me, my heart will beat faster...macam nak putus jak..huh~~

wierd~~

mungkinkah itu cinta??

hahahah~~

lawak..at tht tyme, syida baru nak mengenali cinta~~

ada kemajuan....keep it up girl~~ yeah!

so...

we keep sms,sms,sms,and sms.......

hmm..fyi, when i was in form 5, i'm quite popular (haha..perasan jap)..

maybe it's a fact..maybe no...

many boys wanna me to be their bf..i recieved many sms'es..surat chenta and so on...

but i just can't accept 'em b'coz... i'm tooo into him..yeah..celaka kau!!! 

hahaha~~

we never go out togather...

in school, we never  berdating...

we never talk like other couple in school...

he with his friends...me and my friends...

hoh...

until one day we met at the libry..state libry..( btlka ya state libry? nok kat hopoh ya bah..)

chit chatting for a while..and then go home..

pernah sekali he said "i love you" to me and i was like......hoh?? btol ke??? hepinye...(bodohnya ko syida..memalukan tol..wakakak~~ itulah Syida yg dulu , begitu berbeda dgn yg skrg...hak3)

and the sms routine goes on~~~

SPM was around the corner and i was busy studying..(nerd + skema bah )

so, i think i shud stop all those rubbish --> L.O.V.E...

it's wasting my time...

i sms him..ask him to stop sms me anymore...

i still remember his sms..but not the exact words la...

xxx : ktk rasa kmk syg ktk ka x ? please answer from the bootom of ur heart.. 

me : sik ..(sbb aku rs ko mok main2kn aku but deeply in my heart i wanna answer yes bcoz at the same time i think he love me...hmmmm....)

guess what?? his answer is YES...he loves me...

tp aku dah ckp NO, so, xda harapan lah kan... 

n we stop sms....

(klo korg xfhm, xpe..ini adalah luahan isi hati shj)

we r not couple and for what we sms like hell , evry day n night...

talking abt our future..talking abt our family-to-be..

jadi semua itu hanya mimpi??? (mcm dlm lgu superstar ..kah3)

rubbish..

b4 i stop it..i'd think carefully... i cried...

i hv to cry to forget him..

i hv to cry for a better future...

i hv to cry for the one i love..yea!! i admit it..i love him..

so i cry to flush all my feelings~~

after PLKN, he propose me to b his gf (i dunno whether he's serious or not ).. but i answer NO bcoz i'd couple with another guy from my PLKN camp... 

Huargh~~~~ masa tu aku mcm nak menjerit je sbb knp aku accept awl sgt propose from my ex-bf.. 

klo x.. huargh..lupekan... rubbish.. past is past ok...

everything happen for a reason kan... 

skrg masing2 pun dah ada kehidupan sendiri... 

i dont want to think abt it anymore...

i'm writing this bcoz..aku terdengar lgu hoobastank - the reason ..

so it recall me the memories... 

and the reson is you~~~~~ (T_T);;

bye~~ bye~~

kita mmg xda jodoh..hek3..

aku sdg menunggu bakal DBA msuk meminang 4 thn dr skrg..wakakak~~

and aku harus bersedia mental n fizikal...coz...adalah..i'll tell u later... 

da~~~~~